Thursday, March 09, 2006

I tend to put my foot in my mouth by not saying anything, when even saying the wrong something would be better.

I am an idiot. I am just going to come out and say it.

I tend to avoid that which makes me sad, even if it is sympathy to another person. Part of it is a self-defense mechanism born out of dealing with traumatic events in the past. I shut down, because I don't know what to say. It's a character flaw that I can't seem to overcome. I'm working on it. But I'm still an idiot.

If I have hurt anyone with this inability to (see, I can't even get this right) say the right thing at the right time, or in fact say anything at all, I am more sorry than I can express in words. I want to be able to do this. I am trying to do this.

I just feel like I have let down people I care about.

I'm sorry...

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